Monday, March 07, 2005

For Her

I look with awe at the woman walking the treadmill next to me. Her third day in the gym and she is showing more energy than I am. Her ID card says 50 though her face and appearance dont. She is slightly shorter than me, about 4 or 5 kilos heavier. She is probably the only woman her age in this gym who doesnt need a weight loss program. She wipes off the sweat from her face and reaches for the water bottle, ready to go to the next machine. She catches my eye and I smile at her through the mirror, wondering why I dont resemble her at all. My mom.
Funny, to think of it now. I only got close to my mother after I moved far away from her and left to college. She had tried to the best of her ability to make me stay at home and attend a local college, something I declared I would never do. I screamed and cried and fought and finally got permission to leave home.
After my parents left me at college and went back, I realised what 'homesick' meant. It was those tears which rushed to your eyes when you heard their voice on the fone. It was all the emotions that crushed you when you realised you had just missed their call. (It wasnt the age of the cellfones yet) These sentiments didnt last long though. Probably about two weeks while I got a hang of college and the concept of ragging. Mom would always take the first oppurtunity to send me a letter. She would post it with Homeo medicines, some allergy tablets or with a dd I'd never asked for. I would read them about 15 times and carefully put them away. If she found any known soul taking the trip from Delhi to Pilani, I would get something. Chips, mysorepa, pickles and a letter in her small neat slanted handwriting.
During the holidays I would wake up early just to catch her still cooking in the kitchen, sit on the kitchen counter and narrate all the happennings of the semester that was just over. Exciting happennings, movies, plays, exams, sicknesses and eventually even crushes. I would tell her the stuff that our college days were made of while she kneaded the dough and fried the fish. She was more excited than I was when I left to France for 6 months. I taught her to use Yahoo messenger then and it became our newest and hottest mode of communication. She would be so thrilled with the smileys that chatting with her would be like a fully animated conversation, bringing a smile to my face thousands of miles away. She returned my favor. When I got back from cellfone starved Pilani, she taught her ignorant daughter how to message using the fone and how to send movie song ringtones to her number.
As a young girl, my mother was a famous dancer in Malaysia where she grew up, wearing shorter skirts and hipper styles than I have ever worn in my 22 years. As a result of which, she wanted me to have some artistic inclining. I was given the green signal to pursue many things. Karate, Dance, Music, Ikebana, painting lessons and so on. But sadly, today the only thing I can do well in public is speak. Sometimes I do feel I let her down, atleast for her sake I shouldve learnt to dance . Dance well, that is.
I have very little barriers of what to discuss with my mother. Last week, I was telling her about how some pubs in Bangalore have strippers for women's day and how much fun it would be to go see. Her motherly act lasted a few seconds, and that too only in her eyes. Soon we were both cribbing about why our home city has no nightlife. Given a choice between my mom and one of my close friends, I would take my mom out for a wild night, anyday.
To the rest of the world she is the disciplining mom. To me, she's happy that I've found the person I want to marry. She is secretly even happier that atleast he has some artistic inclinations. When my brother decided that he wants to marry his American girlfriend, he told my mom first. For she just wouldnt say no. Today she's gleefully submerging herself in wedding plans announcing loudly to her friends that her kids have minds of their own and that she's terribly proud of it.
She did join the gym for me, to give me company. Today I counted three friends I had made there, which included two guys who asked me if I was in school. My mom's tally is 8 and still growing. At this rate, i will soon be known as ' her daughter'. Not that I really mind.
She taught me how to dress, today I'm her self appointed fashion consultant. She taught me to write but it's me who writes up and dramatizes all her club speeches. There are somethings you can give back and there are some you cant even come close to. I only hope that when it's my turn, I do atleast half the good job that she is doing. Love you mom.

20 comments:

Unknown said...

I thought today was "International Women's day". Is it Mother's day too?

Those Chips, mysorepa, and a letter continued all thro' the four years!!

Rathish said...

Great blog! One of those times when reading something makes you want to meet the person :)

Meera said...

I should thank ur mom for the melagu vada... yummy!!!
no wonder the daughter is a wonderful creation too....

Peak Day Blues said...

Hi Sandhya,

Just happened to hop on to your blog. I just read this article and I am awe struck!! Really, never knew that such great mallu talents are there in TamilNadu, especially in Coimbatore.

Am a mallu working at Coimbatore and have a blog of my own. Do check it if you have time.

Or u can give me a buzz at 98942-25259... would be interested in having a conversation with an intelligent person!

Mahadevan said...

it was nice reading it.

Recover old blog said...

Parashu does not comment on personal ramblings but w.r.t you previous posting he would want to comment.

Parashu's message for you 'You are not a malayalee, you are a B/BOK.

Rise and shine.

~S~ said...

Tenny/Parashu, why and how would I not be a Malayalee?
Only the purest mallu blood runs in me and I dont plan to let go of that honour- just b'coz u deem so!

sreeshma said...

Of all U'r writings that I've chanced upon, be it school essays, mouthshut reviews, letters, mails[ok I'm getting carried away:-)] this one is special...and why not.. after all Moms are special!! Show this to her some day!

Way to go girl!!

Love,
Sreeshu

Ganesh said...

WONDERFUL piece, sandhya. saw a lot of shades of my mum in it. read a few other pieces of yours too. cutest babies - very cute, but i have a 3-month old son to challenge them - just kidding !

Bugs said...

hey sandhya,

bhargavi here. nice blog! visit mine sometime vettikathai.blogspot.com

Kumari said...

Hey Sandhya,
Lovely post :)
Keep writing more!

ponc

Mint Chutney said...

I loved this post. My only complaint about your website is that I wish you posted more often!

Pardha Saradhi said...

Very touching. Isn't this writing a nice piece of art. I think yes.

Have a nice day!
Pardha

~S~ said...

Rat, Peak day blues, Prabhu, Sreeshu, Ganesh, Bugs,Kumari, Mint chutney and Pardhu, thanx a ton for your kind words.
I have been away for a really long time because I'm busy with my college admissions and stuff. Will get back to blogland in a coupla days!

kamal said...

Its cool to see you speak about your mom the way you do. Your mom deserves applause for a job well done :)

Durga Prasad said...

Sandhya ... u r hell of a blogger.. just chanced upon ur blog... this blog on MOM was really special indeed...

Arjun.C.N said...

dont tax your brain hard on my name Sandhya. If you can remember Karthika from Avila.. and Sanghamithra too... you'll remember me... i live in chinnamal street.. Karthika was my neighbour.. so had met you once in her house.. and in some school competition. i dont remember... gimme ur mail id.. or drop in a mail... i'll try to dig it up.. else free... Nice Blog.. Nice writing... keep it going on... Btw are you gonna join XLRI ???

Braveheart said...

Came here through Parth's blog. Really well written :)

-- Akshaya

Karthik Rajagopal said...

Hi

When I studied in Amrita many ppl have talked a lot abt u... Now, even in my work-place one of my friends Ramakrishnan (BITSIAN)had described u in his own beautiful way... Only now I understand who u are? I have never read any blog in my life... ur word flow effortlessly like water... And I feel liike meeting ur mom :-)

Anusha's Mom said...

Very well written, an experience many of us can relate to.